Jilted Jack


You’re seriously bringing the crown, said she
Sure you’re only going up The Dains hill
And how in God’s name has this farcical show
Now become part of the drill?

You know it’s to calm my anxieties Love
Sure you know I hate traveling alone
The crown is a great source of comfort, said he
When I’m out and about on my own

Right said she, but don’t take all day
I’ll sort out the tea when you’re back
And might you explain why it takes so long
With only a bucket to pack?

You know that’s an awkward old bucket, said he
And you know that the handle is shot
I lost two thirds of it last day out
For surely you haven’t forgot

Right said she, we’ll both of us go
We’ll each of us take either side
But I’m telling you now, this is the last day
Two of us go for this ride

Right you be Love, we’ll both of us go
And the two of them took to the road
Silently scaling the hills affront
Before fetching and sharing the load

In the hauling and dragging well what would you think
The head gear it started to slip
Impeding his eyes then twisting his feet
Of course he was going to trip

Looping the loop as he tumbled and fell
And sweeping his better half down
As she lay on the earth, drenched to the bone
She said, I’m getting rid of this clown


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